every beat of my heart

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

♥ Tuesday, September 30, 2008

and in the end, it seems like everything is my fault. my fault that i dont wish to take a side. my fault that i didnt express my awkwardness/uncomfort. my fault that she now thinks that im damn fake. GREAT. now im involved in it too.

this seems so back to primary school days. oh mannn

and i thought that we are gonna forget about it since there isnt really a solution to it.

oh i am so wrong.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

♥ Sunday, September 28, 2008

i cant believe recess week is over just like that. had meetings every single day from monday to thurday, den a 2D1N kelong trip on sat. in fact i just came back from m'sia this afternoon. sth different i must say. shall blog abt it once i upload the photos.

but recess week is pretty fruitful. at least i have finished reading a great book. and i dun rmb the last time i actually finish a book i started (oh yesss OMG!!). my ps i love you is still left hanging at page 169? its too draggy and the only motivation to keep me gg is the next letter/note he wrote for her. read during the PA days and stopped when PA ended. shucks lousy pok!

anw, i have been mulling over an issue over the week.

i have finally met up with S a few days ago. it has been a while since i have met her, like last year? ok i exaggerated. but really sit and talk - it has been a really long time since we did that. with such busy schedules, i hardly see her ard in school which is rather sad. a big change for me in fact, which made me even more sad when i finally did get to meet her. ok wad an emo freak i am.

so we were on the topic about friendship or rather the people around us we often called friends. in my point of view, i always thought im a pretty good friend on average. pple say i always complain when i see them so i will try to minimise my complaining habits. whenever pple need me to help them i would try if its within my limits. i will organise mini meet-ups, even if its just an hour or so, just to catch up with each other.

or maybe i have been trying too hard. so hard that some just take me for granted. so hard that when its my turn to ask some1 to do something for me its like asking them to donate a kidney. sometimes ill question myself wat kind of friends im actually having, u know those who are really sincere to be friends with u, showing concern, sharing the woes and the joys, those who enter in ur life for a period of time and probably the next time u will see them is on facebook's news feed, those whom you just wanna have fun with, and thats it and those whom u just talk just for the sake of erm talking. just when i start questioning myself who are the ones whom ill actually foresee that our friendship will last till our 26th birthdays (im not talking abt bff or wadsoever here), sad to say i can only list a handful.

and then i realise that some pple aren't worth your time. call me a pushover, after thinking for quite a long while, wad she said does make some sense. true enough, i don't wanna spend so much time and effort on pple who aren't gonna be appreciative and treasure the meaning of friendship. those who dun even give a damn about my presence and just do things to include me in to make them feel/look good. i dun need such pple in my life. and here i am trying to be nice to these pple and at the end of the day, ill be laughing at myself for actually acting so pathetic in front of these pple. wad for. ill be behaving like them, isnt it?

back to S, i realise wad a terrible terrible friend i am to her. i wasnt there when she was gg through all these. i only knew abt it much later. and i actually blamed the busy schedule. but deep down, i wondered if i were there, maybe things will not be that bad. feeling vexed and yet i cant do anything abt it. f.

and tonight. i just received another one.

Monday, September 22, 2008

♥ Monday, September 22, 2008

OMG DBSK'S 4TH ALBUM!! my fav guy in the mv has gotta be jj!! with his arms tied to the wall!! AHHHHH!!!~~~~ omg i sound like a psychotic.and somehow i think the uneven fringe will be an in thing soon. or at least for korea.

ok work work WORKKKKK!!

Sunday, September 21, 2008

♥ Sunday, September 21, 2008

the korean quiz is D-E-A-D. im just waiting for the s/u option so that i can s/u it soon! wait in the end i get u. whahahha. -____-

weekend was good. didnt get any work done too. oh great! aerin's chocolate cake is damn power!! immediately lifted up my spirits (ok maybe a little) and hy was pretty amused at how i attacked the cake. ha! haji lane! first time there and i must say its pretty cool! the prices are not as cool though. met up with junyan and his car and seriously for the first time, i kanna honked so many times on the road. and silly chit actually used the gps to find some beancurd store (she actually keyed in the name of the stall!!) and of course it was not available. we ended up at beach road hawker - a place where i have not been since nj days? had my fav jap food (i only wanted the chawamoshi initially but ended up getting the whole set!!) and the belgium choc fondue which is super ultra shiokkkkk! sinful sinful chocolate for the past 2 days!! oh my tian!

had a morning run at macritchie with sm, mich and chit. sm was damn funny. when i msg her 'meet at mac', she replied, 'which mac?' erm macritchie my dear. LOL. we wanted to run the usual 10k which we normally ran during nj times but in the end we were like super duper lost. so in the end we ran 5k, walked 4 k and ran another 5km again. oh my!! sm is now my new trainer!! damn scared to lag behind. she will push from behind and for a very long time!!! but good training lah! hurhur. should run more often with her. while she trains for her 42.195km, ill train for my erm 15km real run. LOL

team gathering at van's place. a pity i had to leave early - just when every1 arrived! sighhhhs. watched she's the man and seriously, i dun rmb laughing so hard for a pretty longggg while. best chick flick ever to watch with ur girlfriends. oh yep. princess diaries tooo!! LOL

so i went for some unknown relative's wedding dinner at pan pacific. thought it would be pretty boring but it turned out to be surprising hilarious. especially uncle janus! LOL!!

when we arrived
my aunt (talking to my cousin): oh. uncle janus is here alr
jing: huh? uncle? isn't he like our generation?

LOL!!! he was damn upset when he heard that. ha!

some aunt: oh so this is ur elder daughter (pointing at me)
janus: *burst out laughing* oh man i feel so happy suddenly.

janus (taking the last bowl of sharks fins, and me giving him an innocent, doe eyed look, hoping he would give it to me): what? u want this? later i give u my veg lah. healthier.

wth!! evil pig cannn! -_____- he doesnt even eat veg in the first place. argh

oh play time over. back to serious work. 219 meeting tmr. fyp on tues. 214 on wed. korean on thurs. oh wait next week is recess week? doesnt seem like it to me. haiz...

KELONG TRIP!! 5 MORE DAYSSSSSS!! (:

Thursday, September 18, 2008

♥ Thursday, September 18, 2008

is the world getting more fake or am i part of this major play which im totally disgusted by? everyone's acting skills are darn bad and yep, the truth really hurts.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

♥ Tuesday, September 16, 2008

i have loads of stuff to blog abt and i have no idea where to start. oh welll

- we got 1st for IVP and 6th for opens.(:
- and i just told ty abt it and she wants to talk abt it over team dinner. hmmm
- i applied for smu local exchange for next sem! hopefully it will be approved though the chances are pretty low.
- now i really dread gg for korean lessons and im having a test this friday which i so gonna die for.
- signed up for real run alr! yayness!
- so now lehman has collapsed. and so has merrill. bank crisis!! oh mann. seems like me working in a bank sounds so impossible now. esp during the period after i graduate. maybe i should work in a cafe cum bakery and improve my baking skills while the market improves. poor andrew is still so determined yet worried that he cant get a job in the bank (which im sure he will eventually). ha.
- and im so damn black now (thanks to the comp). everyone i see in school said that. even my fellow blackie kugen. i saw him today and believe me! im as black as him now (just w/o the hair). and just now he reminded me to be careful while i was happily eating my chocolate in case i bite myself. ha funny!
- i just made HER angry again. haiz. now i think i made her angry more often than jessine. oh well wad to do. its my faultttt.

ok. back to korean now! annyonghikaesaeyo!! sayonara!! zaijian!

Friday, September 12, 2008

♥ Friday, September 12, 2008

Do you hear me,
I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying

Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Ooohh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you I promise you, I will

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Lucky we're in love every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

And so I'm sailing through the sea
To an island where we'll meet
You'll hear the music fill the air
I'll put a flower in your hair

though the breezes through trees
Move so pretty you're all I see
As the world keeps spinning round
You hold me right here right now

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
I'm lucky we're in love every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

Ooohh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
Ooooh ooooh oooh oooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

I LOVE THIS SONGGGG!! kinda reminds of the r/s between monica and chandler! SWEEEET!!
(:

and its finally the weekend! mid atumn festival! mooncakes! lanterns! competition! super packed for the weekend!! as usual... and i haven found my stitch/barney lantern!!! RAHHHHH!

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

♥ Wednesday, September 10, 2008

i was on my way home in ps's car and i heard this song and it kept playing in my head. i love this song, its like cook made it famous again after mariah carrey. somehow this song sounds better when sung by a male singer instead of a female. the lyrics i guess.

planning to take part in the 15km. tried to reg today but the system abit cocked up. chit and hy not intending to go. bunny how? ):

ok this is so random. chit and i made this while waiting for the games to end, so as to shift back the boats. eventually i didnt shift back but hey, the intention was there alrightie. but aiya, i can predict pple will still say me for not shifting the boats at all this comp. oh well.

today is such a longgggg day:
- ba219 crap session
- korean class. oh my. did i mention i need to perform a skit? saranghaeyo oppa! ok so dramamama
- bickering session with kug and hs
- jap lesson ALONE!! ):
- celebrated blackie's and ym's birthday
- experimenting the datastream with tongx2 but failed once again.
- met hy and chit for dinner
- trng

and tml...
- fyp meeting
- 214 meeting
- 214 lesson
- 214 meeting

WHY SO MANY MEETINGSSSS??!?!

♥ Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Monday, September 08, 2008

♥ Monday, September 08, 2008

i cant believe i actually have the time to blog, even with all the work on my table undone! so much that i decided to go for a morning run and after that just hang out at HVSB to get some serious work done and here i am BLOGGING. well done leepeng! OMG..

just finished watching friends season 3 episode 7 and im so relieved that chandlier has finally broken up with janice. and i got overly excited when ben called mon 'monica ~~bing~~ bang'. and phoebe's story abt her dentist visits and how everytime she goes to the dentist, some1 will die. LOL. wad a great excuse to not visit a dentist. and GOSSIP GIRL SEASON 2 has started! at least sth to look forward to on mondays. HA!

so week 2 is over. and this coming weekend will be the finals. and that will be the finale.

and OMG! its the start of week 6 now!! and it feels like the first day of school ytd. oh mannn. i wish there's like 48 72 hrs a day. time passes so fast and it seems like time is controling me and and not the other way round! the last week was like damn blur. kept hallucinating that i have project meetings and yet in the end there wasn't. darn. soon it will be the end yr3sem1 and i will be graduating. shucks man! -___-

i seriously need a break. like a really longgggg one. BAHHHH!

Thursday, September 04, 2008

♥ Thursday, September 04, 2008

support local music!!! love rai!! (:
falala falala falala (:

anw updates!

the girls present

our little squirrel is finally 21!!
SWEET!!
pls dun say i didnt dress according to the theme - im holding on to the GOLD and PURPLE balloons, which almost killed me btw those who were present pengminshan
us playing with the deco while hf was busy entertaining the guests
the cake. its LANA OK!!!

another one turning 21. (:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUIFENNNNNN!!! (:

sunday - THE NIKE HUMAN RACE! (:

us sweaty and aching after the run
and we stayed to watch BLG perform!
it was pretty rush coz we went down right after our match and all. run was pretty alright, well at least the weather isn't that bad, no rain and no sun too. and i finally got to see michelle and hy. i dunno why. seems like i haven seen hy for quite a pretty long time, isn't it?

another run down. no more runs to motivate me. sians. planning to register for real run 15km. RUNNING PARTNER!!!! (:

and i keep having weird dreams recently. i even dreamt of my own funeral. OMGGG!

work is piling and im always stuck at every task i do, well except for jap. fyp is a killer. to those who are not in final yr now pls enjoy while u can. im serious.